Transcript Episode 11: The uphill battle of raising vegan kids (and what to do about it)
Karla Moreno-Bryce: Today, I want to shine light on all of us who are raising or thinking about starting to raise a family on a vegan diet.
Many of you know that this journey of being vegan ourselves and especially in raising vegan children can often feel lonely and at times a bit uncertain. As we get questioned by others or receive negative comments, we begin to question our ability to confidently feed our kids but also whether this lifestyle is even the right one for our family.
I remember a very overwhelmed client once shared with me whether she should just give in to the pressure from others and go back to eating animals because of the negative experiences in feeding her family vegan. And it hurt me to hear that because she’s not the only vegan parent who has thought of that. And I empathize with her because I know those feelings all too well, not only from a personal perspective but also professionally.
I want to take you through one specific experience not too long ago, which was with a fellow colleague, because despite this experience being with another dietitian, I know you can relate. And then, I’d like to share one tip on how you can move forward if you ever encounter negative comments about your own lifestyle. I just feel called to do so because at the end of the day, we all want to raise our family in a way that feels in alignment with our values; in a way where we feel proud; in a way where we feel complete confidence in the foods and meals we prepare for our growing kids to support their growth.
So, in today’s episode, I want to remind you of the one thing that you should carry with you at all times throughout your vegan family journey. So that you can not only feel proud as a vegan parent but also confident that this is the right thing to do no matter what others have to say about it. And if you found this episode valuable, I’d be so grateful if you can share with other parents and caregivers who may be feeling a bit uncertain about their journey as a result of negativity or backlash from others. Together, my hope is that we make this community of vegan parents and caregivers stronger than ever knowing that we won’t let others let us down on moving forward in our vegan family journey.
Now, I want to be honest with you in that I don’t have all the answers on how to best raise a vegan family or in handling negative comments or other situations regarding my vegan lifestyle. I love sharing my own personal experiences with you in hopes that you may find inspiration or at the very least support you of your lifestyle of choice but I don’t have it all together. Like many of you, I’m still learning how to navigate this journey in raising a vegan family, both on a personal level and professionally. I’m learning how I want to teach my kids about veganism, how to best handle social outings like at birthday parties, and how to speak to others about my choice in raising my family vegan in a way that feels authentic and compassionate. I’m still learning like so many of you. While I’m much more confident now on how to respond to negative comments, I am still learning how to find my way in a world that doesn’t yet fully accept our choice in raising a vegan family. But I know that I’m not alone and neither are you.
Which leads me to share a not so pleasant experience with you. An experience that reminded me that this journey in being a vegan parent may feel like an everyday uphill battle but in the end, it’s a rewarding one. One that allows to bring awareness, education and a bit more peace.
I recently had a dietitian reach out to me with many questions. This dietitian genuinely seemed interested in wanting to know about the nutritional adequacy of a vegan diet for children, asking whether children can truly meet essential fatty acids from plant foods, or whether they meet enough protein from plant foods, or if I’m concerned in any way about the bioavailability of iron and calcium from plant foods.
When some of us get similar questions from others, we often get defensive and try to prove or justify our diet of choice. And while it’s easy to fall into that pattern when we get questioned, I challenge you to question and identify why they are so curious about it. I share more about this in episode 4 and you can find the link in the show notes if you want to take a listen.
So, when this dietitian asked me these questions, I tried to put myself in their shoes and see a vegan diet from their perspective. I welcomed their questions and tried to understand why it seemed like they were not on board with a vegan diet for kids based on how the questions were framed. It seemed like they needed some sort of proof that a long term vegan diet was adequate to support growth and brain development.
Now, this isn’t the first time a fellow dietitian has questioned my advocacy for a vegan diet for children. It’s not the first time a healthcare professional has come with apprehension about how a vegan diet can truly support the growth and development of children. In the past, getting these questions from other colleagues left me feeling a bit nervous to answer anything at all. I questioned my own knowledge, ability and understanding of vegan nutrition and even asked myself “Who am I to be considered an expert in this field?”.
And that doesn’t come easy for me to say but professionally, that’s the uphill battle that I’ve personally had to learn how to overcome so that I can confidently speak about vegan nutrition for kids in other areas of my life. I’ve had many experiences where I felt unsure about my choice in raising my daughter on a vegan diet, but the more comfortable I got with receiving doubtful questions from others, the more comfortable I got with responding.
So, when this dietitian reached out to me with questions, I didn’t feel criticized or challenged like I used to in the past. I felt confident in my answers, my choice, and most importantly in my values for raising a vegan family. I quite honestly didn’t care what their thoughts were because I know that the evidence shows a vegan or plant-based diet for growing children is perfectly healthy and safe to follow, just as long as adequate nutrition is provided.
And that’s what I want to remind you today that being challenged by others about how a vegan diet supports the growth of children may feel uncomfortable and at times you may be afraid to even speak up about your choice. I’ve felt hesitant to speak up early on in my journey, especially when I began my Instagram account. I used to get negative comments from trolls and that really affected my mental energy. And to this day, I get hundreds of negative comments and hurtful things from individuals. Things like I’m causing child abuse, that I am an ignorant parent, or that I should stop forcing my twisted ideology on an innocent child. That last one is taken word for word from a comment.
I get that hearing and receiving negative comments are hurtful. You and I have experienced very similar situations and I 100% know how you feel because after hearing many stories from vegan parents about the experiences you’ve had, it doesn’t leave you in a good place. It not leaves you feeling demoralized but it also leaves you with doubt and uncertainty. And I just want to say that you don’t deserve that. You don’t deserve to feel distrust in your own choice and your values. You deserve understanding and most importantly, support.
I actually find some of these questions, judgment and negative comments from others problematic because no other parent who chooses to raise their children in a different dietary pattern gets looked down upon the same way vegan parents do. Although the negative comments, the criticism, the judgment and the pressure from others often feels overwhelming, it’s a reminder that we are bringing change into this world. That we are bringing more awareness about a vegan lifestyle in general and that as parents choosing to raise a vegan family, we are making a conscious choice to not partake in any practice that exploits animals.
And that’s what I want you to carry with you everyday when you wake up in the morning and begin to feed your family, that you are making an impact. An impact that not only extends more compassion to animals but to the future of our children and generations to come. And that is something to be so, so proud of.
I know it’s very difficult to deal with negativity and judgment from others. It’s difficult because it seems like this is an uphill battle we have to experience every single day. To some of us, that may even feel tiring to do on a daily basis. But the more true you stay to your values and the more certain you are with how you’re raising your children, the less pressure you’ll feel to give in to what others say. The more you hold on to what’s important for you and your family, the stronger you’ll become at handling these unpleasant experiences with others. I believe in you and more importantly, I support you.
If you’re looking for further support in raising your family on a vegan lifestyle, grab my free Essential Starter Kit Guide that walks you through the key elements in making sure your kids thrive on a vegan diet. I’ll leave the link to that free guide in the show notes.
Alright my friends, that is all for today. I know raising a vegan family can be difficult at times when others look down upon our values or choices but no matter how challenging it may be, remind yourself of why you started this journey and why it’s important to you. That is something that no one will ever take away from you. I’ll see you in the next episode. Bye for now.